what it means to be human

i want to grab a pen
and write down all things
about what it is to be human
but i am too tired to hold on to
anything
much less a pen that leaves calluses
red and unhappy

i want to put on my ballet slippers
and wear a hole in the leather
but my feet are inflamed
after i
slip off my sneakers
dirty from a day’s work

i want to sing out loud
a tune that is both beautiful
and haunting
something that sticks in the mind
but my voice is gone
it ran away after i abused it
yelling about things that don’t matter
so much after a minute or two